When the narcissist leaves you in the dust & moves on with their new life, they seem to now be a new & improved version. If they were addicted to drugs & alcohol when they were with you, they’ll now appear clean & sober with the new victim. You’ll think,”This is the man that I deserved to be with & now he is this way for her?!”
You may have spent years trying to get them the help they needed, but they refused. To add insult to injury, they’ll tell anyone who will listen that you were the cause of their addiction. You wouldn’t support their sobriety, were codependent & kept them weakened with drugs or alcohol so that they wouldn’t leave you.
Perhaps your ex was struggling with an injury or illness you met her. You researched the symptoms, causes and solutions, becoming an expert. You took her to the best doctors & nursed her back to good health. Of course, you also paid all of the bills and were completely dedicated to her recovery. Once she is back on her feet, she will leave you and do all of the things you two could not while she was ill.
You may not have been able to have children together & were heartbroken by this reality. Now you see that his new girlfriend is pregnant and they are so excited. Your heartbreak worsens exponentially.
Perhaps you built a business together under the guise that it was a partnership & you were their righthand man. You were in this together and your future would be secure. Once that business was up & running, they sought a target who would further their success, possibly a client, coworker or someone in the same industry. This person slides into the place meant for you, and you watch helplessly as your business becomes theirs. Your future becomes theirs. Now, you must not only heal from the relationship, but you must also rebuild your financial & professional future.
But know this: When you were in the joyful stage of your relationship with the narcissist, their ex was watching from the sidelines & longing for the version you were with. This is a cycle that never ends. The narcissist is fundamentally flawed & only fixes the parts that will help them appeal to a new target. Don’t believe that the version you’re seeing now is truly better; they will devolve, shed their skin and move on again and again.
If you are struggling to recover from this type of relationship, please contact me to schedule a one-on-one phone consultation. We can get you through this.